Understanding children is important

MNA Life Style Desk: Understanding your children is one of the most important things that you should learn as a parent. It is very helpful in becoming effective in guiding and nurturing your child as they grow and mature. You need to bear in mind that your child has a unique personality trait that remains consistent throughout life.

Overall behavior

Children often show us they are having a problem through their behavior rather than words. If your child is acting out and getting into trouble often, it is a clue that something needs to be problem-solved or that they need emotional support to cope and move forward. All children need guidance about emotions and relationships. If you ask for help or learn more about emotions and relationships yourself, you and your children will benefit.

Language of feelings

One of the most important things you can teach your children is to recognize what they are feeling and to express their feelings in words. Help your children grow by teaching the many words for different emotions, and using examples when those feelings arise in themselves and others.

Creativity

It is our job as adults to teach them these skills. Every child is different so we need to figure out what reaches each child individually. Look to what they truly enjoy to help them express themselves. Play, games, sports, art, writing, dance, horticulture, photography, music, and acting or role playing situations are great ways of helping kids learn to cope with difficult feelings and relationships.

In real trouble

If a child shows an unusual amount of anxiety, fear, anger, stress or pain, it is important to get him the help he needs. As parents, we must not be too prideful when it comes to raising our kids. How our children feel should always outweigh how we are viewed as their parents. The best thing we can do for our children are to be selfless in our commitment to getting their emotional needs met.

The way kids think is very important

Notice your child’s language and comments about him or herself and others. If your child says negative things repeatedly, it is a problem. It usually means they aren’t feeling good about themselves and need support to problem-solve and change that type of thinking.

Negative thinking is dangerous to mental health because it builds on itself. It becomes automatic to think painful and self damaging thoughts, much like learning an instrument or a sport, but with a negative result rather than a positive one.